My Neuroses For Your Entertainment

Pants, Your Numbers Mean Nothing to Me

Here’s the deal: I’ve got a size 8 waist and hips, slightly longish legs & the world’s longest torso and I need pants. And I’m having a hard time finding a brand of jeans that’s really targeting my type and producing a comfortable fit jean with a 35 inch inseam and about a ten inch rise. I need pants that would potentially come up to another woman’s boobs while simultaneously swallowing her feet, but have a 29 inch waist. How is that not a thing? 

I think I’ve discovered an untapped demo in the world of women’s jeans. I may start my own company that makes long, skinny, granny-waisted jeans. It will be hugely successful, I’m sure. 

Morris Chestnut met the ocean last weekend. My dog and I, we had a good time. 

Morris Chestnut met the ocean last weekend. My dog and I, we had a good time. 

17 Celebrities Who Have The Right Idea About Feminism

(Source: BuzzFeed, via boogieordie)

“[Beliefs] are really nothing but opinions one refuses to reconsider. Beliefs are easy. The stronger your beliefs are, the less open you are to growth and wisdom, because “strength of belief” is only the intensity with which you resist questioning yourself. As soon as you are proud of a belief, as soon as you think it adds something to who you are, then you’ve made it a part of your ego.”
http://theunboundedspirit.com/9-mind-bending-epiphanies-that-will-turn-your-world-upside-down/
Thirty

Today, I am thirty years old. 

I have a job. My bills are paid on time. I can afford to go to the doctor when I need to. I have a little family: my husband and our dog. We live in a little apartment. We visit family on some weekends and holidays. I have a nephew who sends me videos of himself singing for my birthday and a niece who looks just like me. My friends love me, and I love them. 

I’ve made a life for myself that brings me joy every single day. And I’m only thirty. 

That’s something to hang my hat on, that is. I may not go down in history books, but I get to have happiness every day. Every. Day. 

Me and my little life, we’re doing just fine. We’re doing great. 

(Dogs don’t understand “family selfies.”)

italicsmine:

I started watching The Voice again and my lord I am in love with Pharrell Williams.

Pharrell has been/may always be my number 1 celebrity crush. Pharrell can see into your soul. Pharrell can make a grown man cry. Pharrell is my Oprah. 

italicsmine:

I started watching The Voice again and my lord I am in love with Pharrell Williams.

Pharrell has been/may always be my number 1 celebrity crush. Pharrell can see into your soul. Pharrell can make a grown man cry. Pharrell is my Oprah. 

Sometimes, my dog sits upright sort of like a human and when he does this, I call it “wearing his tiny pants.” (Just go with it, ok?) And sometimes I’ll sing to him “Put your tiny pants on!” and I just found this gif and MY LIFE IS COMPLETE THANK YOU!

Sometimes, my dog sits upright sort of like a human and when he does this, I call it “wearing his tiny pants.” (Just go with it, ok?) And sometimes I’ll sing to him “Put your tiny pants on!” and I just found this gif and MY LIFE IS COMPLETE THANK YOU!

This is My Life

Saturday night I cried because my dog tried to eat my caterpillar friend.

I will be 30 years old in 3 days. I don’t think I’m going to “grow out” of crying over animals. Sorry, adults in my life. 

humansofnewyork:

"When I was fifteen, I was raped by three boys while competing at a gymnastics tournament. I was so ashamed, that I stood on a train track, and waited for the train to come. At the last moment, I tried to jump away. I woke up after a month. It was the middle of the night, and I could immediately tell that something was missing. I started feeling all over my body, and that’s when I realized that I’d lost my arm. Now I counsel teenagers who have been diagnosed with HIV. I’m normally the first to meet with them after they get their results. I try to explain to them that there’s a way out of even the most impossible situations."
(Odessa, Ukraine)

there’s a way out of even the most impossible situations

humansofnewyork:

"When I was fifteen, I was raped by three boys while competing at a gymnastics tournament. I was so ashamed, that I stood on a train track, and waited for the train to come. At the last moment, I tried to jump away. I woke up after a month. It was the middle of the night, and I could immediately tell that something was missing. I started feeling all over my body, and that’s when I realized that I’d lost my arm. Now I counsel teenagers who have been diagnosed with HIV. I’m normally the first to meet with them after they get their results. I try to explain to them that there’s a way out of even the most impossible situations."

(Odessa, Ukraine)

there’s a way out of even the most impossible situations

My dog, my husband, my city

My dog, my husband, my city